To Live...

Will be an awfully big adventure.

March 10th, 2009

New Orleans @ 08:23 pm

Current Mood: pleased
Current Music: Rufus Wainwright- Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk

New Orleans was amazing as always. I thrive in that city. Its so alive with music and color. Anyways I was down there on a mission trip during Mardi Gras. We hung out with the gutter punks and other homeless people trying to help them out by providing them with back packs full of food, socks, flashlights, etc... I was able to give away two blankets I had made. IT felt really great to be there helping people and it changed my views on gutterpunks b/c the ones we met were incredibly grateful and entertaining. One of them told us the beautiful sunset over New Orleans was caused by chemicals and we were all gonna die in four years from cancer just from being here. He also said the scarecrow sitting in the rocks on the bank had been a man three days ago who had swam in the river.

Derrick and Jeb bought a carton of cigarettes for the homeless which I strongly disapproved of but it worked in a way that we were able to easily connect with them.

In between helping we went to Cafe Du Monde and ate benigets (sp)? *overrated funnel cakes*, ate at House of Blues, and Bubba Gump's where I had an amazing bucket of shrimp, lobster, crab, mussels, and oysters. Mmm...

I spoke to a lot of different street preachers who although were nice when approached in the right way but their views were a little extreme. One of them was dressed up as Jesus or John the Baptist *one of them* and carried a big cross. He didn't seem so bad but apparently there was something about him that attracted people to him. So many people were yelling at these preachers. I didn't really understand why b/c if you just ask politely what their views/messgae is/are then its really easy to communicate with them. I don know..

Anyways I had a really great time and I can't wait to go back next year.

Ooh and we watched an awesome band called The Hail Seizures.

Next year I may go early with some friends and try out the whole street performers thing.

Good times...


December 5th, 2008

VBC Craft Show @ 03:41 pm

Current Mood: content
Current Music: Dispatch- Elias

The craft show this year was very fruitful for. I ended up walking away with Mango Butter, and some jam that I've never heard of before and can't seem to recall the name of right now, coconut fudge with walnuts, white macademia nut, amaretto, and english chocolate walnut fudge, and a beautiful yellow desert flower that I also can't recall the name of but there are only three in exsistence b/c the were made by the vendors friend who is an herbist and made the hybrid himself. I ended up naming the plant Capricorn. Don't ask me why I just felt like thats why its name should be. So ya like I said, fruitful.

Ohh! And mom and I enjoyed some delicious sushi @ I <3 Sushi. We had the Alaskan Roll, the Viagra Roll, and one other kind I can't recall.

Jeez my memory has been more on the fritz than ever lately.


Gallery Hop @ 03:19 pm

Current Mood: ecstatic
Current Music: Joan Jett- Baracuda

The Huntsville Annual Gallery Hop was absolutely fantastic yesterday. Granted I was only able to go to the showing at the Flying Monkey but thats enough to quench any art lovers thirst for beauty and talent. The free food and wine was absolutely astounding and the artists were so warm and friendly that I felt bad about being jealous of their work. We also got to shake down to Mambo Gris Gris a rare treat to the ears. Plus I metsome pretty cool people including the guy that followed Nate and I name Reggie. If I could use one word to describe that guy it would be vibrant. We lost him so many times b/c he would stop and carry on a conversation with nearly everyone we passed. His genuine interest in people was like nothing I've ever seen before in a person. He got the number for glass blowing lessons and dance lessons. After that we went downtown to Sammy T's only to find out Saliva was playing and instead of itbeing ladies night they were charging a $25 cover! So welooked around for somewhere else to go but seeing as how I'm underage it was a bit difficult and we ended up forgetting where we parked the mini van. So Nate and I tried to stay warm in a parking garage while Reggie ran around looking for it. After finding it we went and met up with their friend Sterling at Waffle House and it was there where I discovered all three of them knew Anthony from highschool! Oh and they loathed him haha. I couldn't get over that for awhile. But ya the whole night's events were spectacular in my opinion and I enjoyed spending time with 2 of probably the sweetest guys I've met in a long time


November 24th, 2008

I was right @ 08:53 am

Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: Cream- Sunshine of Your Love

I convinced Adam to tell me he was planning on proposing to me. We talked about it a little bit. I told him that we were both too young to think about marriage and that two people shouldn't even consider it until they're at elast 25. Even then I'm not exactly sure I'd wanna get married. My heart wants to tell him yes but my head needs to say. I think he understood but since he went through all the trouble of buying me a ring he's still gonna give it a shot on New Years.

I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him but I want to wait when it comes to getting married.


November 21st, 2008

Art Again @ 11:06 am

Current Mood: content
Current Music: Lisa Loeb- Stay

So I decided to start painting my car again and on one ofthe back windows I'm currently painting Gustav Klimt's "The Kiss". Then once I'm finished with that on the other side I'll probably do one of Van Gogh's Sunflower paintings.

I've really got to try out some of the crafts in the new books I bought "The Big Ass Book of Crafts" and I can't remember what the other one is called but it has to do with altering t-shirts which is perfect for me although I've been using most ofthe shirts I've saved up to make pillows.

I'm also trying to work on some stupid sock creatures. I certainly have enough socks to do it.

I don't know what to do with all these crafts once I've finished them though b/c I don't really like the thought of selling them for ridiculous amounts of money b/c I believe everyone rich or poor should be able to enjoy art. So whatever I'll figure it out.

I'm still probably going to just give away my blankets next time I go to New Orleans


November 19th, 2008

Birth Control @ 01:20 pm

Current Mood: productive
Current Music: Go Sailor- Ray of Sunshine

Well I acted like an adult finally for once in my life. I told my mom I wanted to see the doctor about getting on birth control. It was a lot easier then planning a way to sneak over to the health department.

Now all I have to do is get my lazy ass to Dr. Ingrahm.


November 10th, 2008

Going Back to School @ 09:08 am

Current Mood: happy
Current Music: As Tall As Lions- Ghost of York

Well as soon as I take my next pt test and pass it I'll be headed back to Ft. Jackson South Carolina where my military career originally began in basic, to train as a 42A. It's basically civil affairs, you know family care and military pay. I'm helping people! I won't have to sit in a warehouse ordering devicesof mass destruction. I'll be in an office taking care of people's needs. Not only that my I might be getting a sweet little bonus and if I'm at school I might not be deploying with my unit, which in a way is kind of a shitty thing to think but being away for a couple of months in another state sure beats being away for a year in a hostile country.

I'm looking forward to it.


November 6th, 2008

Canada Never Looked Better @ 05:04 pm

Current Mood: scared
Current Music: Oasis- Bittersweet Symphony

I belive that this generation having mostly been exposed to bush and seeing the destruction it caused is looking for a change and sees it in Obama. Mind you the same thing happened in Germany and that change was Hitler.

Germany was unhappy with its leadership just as America is unhappy with its own.

Germany found promise and change in Hitler just as America sees promise and change in Obama.

I'm not saying the same thing will happen.. What I'm saying is that politics and voting is a serious matter. Its not cool, or faddish... Wearing an Obama shirt does not make you informed. Reading the facts and checking your resources does.

Btw, snopes. com is partially if not completely owned by Obama so I wouldn't trust that as my table of information.


September 2nd, 2008

(no subject) @ 07:18 pm

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: Anti-Flag- No Stars No Stripes

It s true when they say "an army of one" one big sea that tosses you back and forth wherever it wants treating you however it wants. Even more big and dangerous when you try to oppose it. "Hey just sign here all willy nilly on the dotted line and everything is gonna be okey dokey alright?" Back then it seemed like that little piece ofpaper was the ticket to solving all my problems. Now it seems like I have more than ever.

The people are either moronic and brainwashed, or loud mouthed and hateful. I can't really say that I've met an intellectually stimulating person outside the military yet since I've come to Ft. Lee.

The MOS is a joke.. I was literally given 10 answers to my last test and then my instructor changed answers to my test while he was grading it right in front of me. And the test before that I finished in 40 minutes and bullshitted half the answers and I got an 88. *I honestly couldn't tell you thing about what we're supposed to be doing. They weren't kidding when they said its impossible to fail. I don't blame them. Its not like we'll actually be doing this.. No we're "back up infantry" they said. Just like cooks and every other useless mos in the military.

Then the bullshit about being diagnosed with narcolepsy and then shuffled off to a different AIT where they doubt your diagnosis and you have to start over again. Dealing with cancelled appointments and overall bullshit... Even when they tell you, you will be chaptered out, though it takes milli seconds to get you in... To get you out could take months. Their trick is to keep in after your platoon graduates to see if you say fuck it I'm well enough to scoot on through I just wanna go back to my family. Who cares if I have a disorder that potentially could cost me my life or the lives of others if stationed in Iraq. They just need another willing body..

The medicine they give you? The side effects are worse than the problem they're meant to treat and they don't even do that. Crippling depression or you fall asleep randomly...

The rules and regulations pass my range of comprehension.. This has to be this way, tied a certain way, look a certain way. The 7 army values *rarely apply* and the battle buddy system only good when its convienent. What the sgts really want you to do is fuck your battle before they fuck you. In other words rat his ass out instead of helping him to not get caught.

Personally I'd rather go down before my battle b/c I was raised better and I'm not a snitch so fuck you drill sgt.

Fuck I'm tired of this shit. Theres more wrong with the army then any one person could really right about.


August 17th, 2008

More PT More PT @ 06:29 pm

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: John Lennon- Dear Yoko

Oh God "Muscle Failure Monday" I've spent the entire weekend vegging out and being a complete shit bag and come Monday I'm totally gonna pay for it. All day today up until 30 minutes ago all I've had to eat is corn nuts *which are totally awesome btw* and candy* I had to beg someone for their Chinese food. Plus coming in I tripped on the steps and now my big toe is good for nothing other than causing me a great deal of discomfort.

Anyways, yeah... I've pretty much done whatever I wanted to this weekend.

Starting Saturday I slipped my happy ass into some nice civilian clothes despite the fact that my pass said I was to stay in ACUs. Got some sun at the pool and bought a lot of junk.

Then today I decided to skip the buddy system thats forced upon us and made my way alone. I stopped by the gas station for breakfast *corn nuts* before heading on to the Main Px to get a cd case. Formation was @ 6 when we were reissued our weapons andour pass officially ended. Buuuuttt! I still live in Golf Co. Who's formation is much later and ever after there bed check I was still up b/c I just blended in with the graduating platoon who doesn't have a set bed time. So yeah its been a pretty good weekend for Pvt Parker.

Let them call me a shit bag and a sham artist. When you've been screwed over as much as me by the army you'll understand. I just don't give a damn anymore....

Oh and some guy called me a bad Beatles fan b/c I put Dear Yoko on Adam's cd. Well I'm sorry but the lyrics happen to fit my feelings for him. And yes one single woman may have brought about the upheavel of possibly the greatest band ever but who are we to say "nay" to a love that strong? True I don't know the details of the story but neither do I care love is love and I am the last person to stand in its way.


August 9th, 2008

Its All Good @ 05:27 pm

Current Mood: excited
Current Music: Bye Bye Birdie- Put on a Happy Face

I'm excited about coming back home b/c as soon as I do I'll be the proud owner of my very own day care center. Plus since the facility is so large my parents are working on turning a portion of the building into an apartment for me.

This place is seriously awesome.

6000 sq. feet
2 play ground
comes with 2 vehicles
fully stocked with food
big screen
10 bathrooms and a bizillion rooms
2 acres

and the list goes on and on. I am so excited about this and I feel so incredibly blessed. My grandpa is in town to help my mom get the buisness loan since he used to be a bank president so he knows all the loop holes.

OHH! Another thing about me getting out of the military is that since I've been in for 6 months I'm officially considered a veteran and I get all the military benefits!

Life will continue to suck until that final paperwork is finished but I think I can hold on till then. Plus I can't wait to see Heidi again I have missed her more than anything and to be away from her for this long is driving me crazy. I feel like she's growing up without me and I don't want her to forget me. I love talking to her on the phone b/c she's learning so many words and she just brightens my entire being when I hear her.

ok! This is great!


Coming together @ 05:13 pm

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Jimi Hendrix- Castles Made of Sand

I can't wait to be back together with Adam again. He is the shining light of my life and the most positive and wonderful person I've ever known. It doesn't matter how crappy my day is as long as I get to talk to him at the end of it. He makes everything better like one big giant bandaid haha.

We're already making plans as to what it is we'll do when we're reunited. We've decided we'd like to go on a six mile run haha. Honestly I don't care what we do as long as we're together and he feels the same way. He knows what a tough time I've been having here and I really appriciate his concern for me and I trust that he'll always be there when I need him b/c so far he has. I feel so lucky to have him you just don't even know!

Everything seems to be falling into place and I can't wait to get out of this hell hole known as Ft. Lee. Everyone here picks their nose!

But yeah I'm getting a Chapter 517 out of here for narcolepsy. No more army for this one. I hate that it ended like this b/c I was really excited about becoming a sergeant and eventually a captain but it is what it is. I have so many appointments coming up.

1. Sleep study
2. Medication counseling
3. Psych evaluation
4. Anger/stress management every friday
Plus I have to go to the TMC at some point and get my chest pains checked out though I'm pretty sure its caused by my depression and nothing physically wrong.

I'll continue this in another post this one is getting too long.


July 29th, 2008

PT makes you sexy @ 11:51 am

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Dispatch- Headlights

Heavens to Betsy I'm in a good mood today. I don't even know why. I suppose it was out "muscle failure Tuesday" pt session at 3am this morning that has my happy endorphines cooking on down the nerve highway. Couldn't possibly be my meds b/c that stuff makes me depressed. I mean I guess it could be contributing to my spike in energy but still. I even got smoked for 30 min b/c I didn't know what the hell my drill sgt. was talking about concerning my pistol belt and yet I'm the retard walking around now with the only pistol belt that like this. Ya it may be right but should I be the only one that gets smoked for being fucked up? Whatever I'm not pissed. My PG even confessed that the reason he didn't show up for pt today was b/c he was too busy sleeping. I swear that guy just saved himself from be bashing his kneecaps into dust. Okay ya thats it...


July 14th, 2008

No Sleep Tonight @ 09:35 am

Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: Ben Lee- Gamble Everything for Love

I didn't get a tiny grain of sleep last night...

I think I stopped thinking for 30 minutes but that was it..

Up all night with nothing to do. I even looked up "how to fall asleep fast" on the comp but it didn't work so I got up and started to clean.

Then I took my pt test and failed it yet again but this time only by 6 situps. I can't be too upset. I improved on everything and thats pretty damn good for someone who hasn't done pt in almost a month and hasn't slept for over 24 hours. I'm dissappointed but I'm just gonna keep working harder till I get there. I'm taking another pt test next monday so hopefully by then I'll pass it.

I just feel bad for Harris though. I think he wanted me to phase more than I did. He really worked me hard on those situps and I appriciate him taking the time out to help me. It really feels good to have someone attracted to you for all the right reasons for once and theres nothing dirty about it. :)


July 2nd, 2008

Huge ol Update @ 08:23 am

Current Mood: crazy
Current Music: Spike Jones- Hawaiian War Chant

Okay so Brian and I broke up and I think its funny that Mercedes wrote about it before me. I've actually been keeping it on the downlow b/c well its not really a pleaseant thing to disscuss for me b/c I still love Brian there was just something (idk what) miss in our relationship that I needed. Everyone is saying I'm selfish or that I was playing mind games with him. I've always been upfront with him about everything I do. So ya I flirt thats how I naturally interact with people it doesn't mean I'm attracted to them or anything its just how I feel comfortable talking to some people. Now of course I'm not like that when I'm speaking to my elders thats a November Golf right there. And as for being selfish, well don't I have a right to be happy too? And wouldn't it have been unfair to Brian to remain in a relationship with him if I was unhappy? I don't know how things will be when I come home. Whether or my feelings will return or if I'll decide that we really were better off as friends.

Right now though I need to be concentrating on my career and not a relationship. I mean there is so much going on right now in my life that a relationship is really the last thing I need to be worried about.

The vet mos didn't work out for me so I'm reclassing and since my unit is a medical unit I'll just be getting another medical mos so now I don't have to worry about being a truck driver or something terrible like that. Oh and I really hope I don't become a combat medic b/c one that training takes a year and 10 months to complete and two those are the guys that are getting their legs blown off. (side note: I've seen about 30 or some odd people now with either one or both legs blown off and chunks of flesh missing from them) depressing...

I'm hoping for either Dental or Food Inspection. I'd like to do Mental Health but once again it a long training course and I'm ready to get back to Heidi.

Hopefully after I get my orders I'll be able to take my leave and go home for about 10 days or so. I'm really hoping for that. I'm also hoping that I'll phase soon so I can go off post and see the sights as well as be promoted which means more money and I can stop being a fuzzy little private and actually have some rank. I'm shooting for captain before I leave the service but I'll have to work extra hard for that.

Well this is getting really long and I still have a lot of other things to do. So...


June 3rd, 2008

AIT so far @ 10:35 pm

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Jethro Tull- Rumble in the Jungle

Okay so I graduated basic. It was hard but not impossible and I had a shit ton of fun and made some killer battle buddies.

Now I'm in AIT and I gotta say I think its a lot harder. In basic all I had to do was wake up and carry out whatever it was we were doing that day (road march no prob, live fire piece of cake) didn't even have to think about it. AIT however is like college you really have to pay attention and study a lot.

My MOS has a 60% fail rate due to it being the hardest MOS in the military to learn b/c not only are we dealing with more than one species but also b/c its a 2 year course squished into 11 weeks.

The positive side to it is by the time I graduate I will have half the credits required to get my associates in applie science.

A negative though: I have to euthanize animals. We alreadt had a demonstration where the instructor not only euthanized a rat but he also chopped its head off. Then five students were chosen to euthanize and then cervically dislocate a mouse's spine. It's really sad but they have to make sure we are able to take it and they said if any one of us ever grows to enjoy doing it then we need to get out of this MOS. They really care about the animals here and this week we're going to be assigned dogs to take care of. I really hope I get Noel shes so well behaved and she'll just rest her head on my shoulder and let me pet her.

I was told I'd be deploying more often then aciive service but that I'd be going places like Central America and Panama. Mostly to be a box kicker though which is another way of saying food inspector b/c who knows better about how meat and other food products are supposed to look like than a veterinarian?

Back in basic I was so afraid of running into a captain but in AIT I've already eaten lunch with a group of captains. By accident of course and it scared me shitless at first but they were really cool and I've joked around with one of them ever since.

I totally dig hanging out with Beins and Gray b/c they love to mess with the system and its kinda sparked my spirit up. Even though Beins is probably the most forward guy I've ever met. What can you expect army guys in AIT they're all horny...

I still miss my Death Row Family from basic and I'll always be a loyal member of Death Row and represent them proudly.

Ohh we saw something scary yesterday when we were out shopping. A unit just came back from Iraq bringing a lot of injured soldiers since Ft. Sam Houston has the best treatment center in the country. We saw one man without legs and we stood in line behind a guy who looked like his face had been blown up. Everytime I looked at him I stopped breathing b/c I was so horrified. They were both really nice though and the one with no legs had a tshirt on that said "I was blown up in Iraq and all I got was this lousy tshirt". Funny but still kinda sad...

Okay well enough updating I gotta get back to studying.


February 14th, 2008

About a boy @ 05:50 pm

Current Mood: fascinated
Current Music: Radiohead- House of Cards

I met a boy the other day that I found fascinating and mysterious. He had that whole mysterious brooding poet thing going on. Turns out he's actually does write poems and he's probably the most literally stimulating poet I've ever personally known. I've had friend who wrote poetry and to be honest I didn't much care for it but this stuff was brilliant. It seemed like every move he made no matter how bizzare was somehow artistically linked. Its like he was confusing and yet I understood him somehow. Plus he has the most phenomenal facial features I've seen in quite a long time. One of those people you love to look at. It was as if his whole frame was built for his persona. He takes his time before speaking, he's polite, interesting, and intellegent. I believe I may have found a new kindred spirit.

Oh Danny boy, the things you do make my mind spin.


January 21st, 2008

Brian @ 07:24 pm

Current Mood: concerned
Current Music: Cake- Italian Leather Sofa

Starting to wonder if Brian is really worth it. There are a few things that make me doubt if this relationship is really right for me. I'm not too interested in going into detail about it right now but what I can say is currently I'm not too happy with this relationship. He needs to show me he does car and stop being an asshole to me. Sometimes he does something good as if a light went off in his brain saying "oh ya this is how boyfriends behave"

I knew from the beginning it probably wasn't the best time for us to be together but I said yes anyways fearing it would be my only chance. I don't want to regret my decision...


January 8th, 2008

Um... @ 05:57 pm

Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: Regina Spektor- Hotel Song


So Michael came to visit for holiday and I was able to hang out with him a couple times. I find him very intellegent, interesting, and genuine. I really enjoyed being around him the whole time. Brian doesn't trust him and I'm sure he feels threatened by him but there really isn't any need to be. Yes I'm attracted to Michael and after he left I discovered that he's attracted to me as well but, I really would rather just focus on building our friendship. I really am happy just being with Brian. He was so sweet the other day. He took me to Pizza Hut and we were down to the last bread stick and I was just gonna let him have it but without saying anything he broke it in half for us to share. Then later when we weren't together I mentioned that we didn't kiss the whole time we were out that day and he said he'd kiss me extra later. AWW! Then Heidi got sick in the middle of the night and I had to take her to the emergency room and Brian was nice enough to go with me even though he had two classes in the morning and then work that afternoon. I didn't really know what to expect when I started dating Brian but the fact that things have gone so well so far truely surprise me. I know he doesn't fully trust me yet but I do believe he's starting to come around. I think he'll still be jealous for awhile though which is annoying and endearing at the same time.

December 25th, 2007

Finally... @ 11:59 am

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Tegan and Sara- Back in Your Head

B. and Me = We, as in r together.. What has it been 4 years? Better later than never haha. I'm happy really, and no matter what anyone says I swear to God I won't cheat on him. I may fuck up some other way b/c Lord knows I'm crazy but it won't be from cheating I am sure of that.

In other news..

My new friend Ivey rocks! And she lives close so that saves me gas.

Christmas rocked. I got a whole bunch of art stuff which makes me happy but they bought me a stereo for some reason and I don't even listen to cds anymore other than when I'm in my car b/c I have my phone and about 400 songs on it.

I've donated a lot this season b/c it just makes me feel good and I also feel that it improves my karma so there ya go.


To Live...

Will be an awfully big adventure.